I was in the club dancing, shocked at all the hip hop floating through the air when YG came on. *RECORD SCRATCHES* Me and my bestie went from all smiles to this..STRAIGHT FACE. First, it was the two drunken White girls to my left screaming the chorus. Then every, and I mean every, person in the club proceeded to yell MY NIGGA, MY NIGGA at the top of their lungs. Seeing as the crowd in the venue was extremely diverse, my first response was to cease movement and furrow my brow. I was completely appalled. And somehow I was alone. Even my best friend, who had experienced this phenomenon before, was jaded. Initially, I felt like I needed to picket or riot or slap somebody. But then I remembered, those were the words to the song. Once that fact slapped me, another one did. Five seconds earlier when the word nigga was sprinkled in songs, I was cool. So you see I had a pretty complex situation in front of me. I had to address the scary truth that the reason why White people were hollering the N-word in my ear was because of Black rappers. Then I had to chew on the fact that I was completely comfortable with the irony of Hip Hop in this techno club until it became blatant that people outside of my race would embrace all of Hip Hop music; even its use of the word Nigga Sitting real pretty on top of this truth cake was the behavior accompanied with the hollering. The crowd wasn't angry. They weren't pointing at the Black people in the club. In fact, the Black people were irrelevant. Everyone was jumping around with their arms around their friends just as I would have done. The truth hurts. I'm sure one of my teachers is turning in their desk chair because I, the girl who has defended the word Nigga for YEARS, am finally admitting that it has no place in the mouths of ANYONE. Standing in that club gave me a reality slap, and I only have to be slapped once. I suddenly realized that claiming back the word Nigger and making it "positive" by replacing its ending with -a is baseless. I promise before this experience I was a crusader for the N-word. Hailed as the "Angry Black Girl" since high school, I thought I was fighting for the African American tradition of taking scraps and making riches. But I see now that all my fighting just reduced the issue of the word in the first place. I thought throwing the N-word back in the universe after renaming it was a brilliant way that Blacks showed their resiliency. But now the N-word has lost its importance. Its just another profane lexicon. It might as well be the word Bitch. It's a classic case of 20/20 hindsight vision. But I must add this; if we expect Hip Hop to continue being a successful genre of music, then we must also accept all races using the N-word. We must also accept underhanded and polite forms of racism. My Nigga, my nigga, we can't be mad when they jokingly call us Niggers. I'm choosing to keep all variations of the word out of my mouth. I'm sure it will be a hard habit to break, but having those strangers screaming "My Nigga" in my ear completely scarred me. Check out the song by YG and Rich Homie Quan and tell me what you think! Is there a variation of the word nigger you think is ok? Was the word Nigga serving a purpose in the days of NWA that it doesn't serve now? I need some feedback -Mk
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More About MkMk is 23 year old Chicagoan. She attended Howard University in Washington, D.C., studying English. Now back in Chicago, Mk has focused on writing her truths. Outside of ATS, she also writes on Youth Alert, a blog for young Christian believers. Mk is also a stylist at Akira Hyde Park. When she isn't working on the Mag, Youth Alert, or at Akira, Mk is with her family, she spends her time with a good book or cooking.
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